ADAlim

I think I've lost quite a number of friends.. When you are attached, you'll lost contact with some of your friends. And when you are single, you will have lots of friends, but still sort of feeling that you want to be in love or something..

I think humans are never satisfied with themselves..

I'm not satisfied with myself too.. I feel that I can do better in my studies, I feel that I can be prettier, I feel that my clothes are never enough, I feel that being with jeremy everyday isn't enough, I feel that I do not have many friends.

It's so scary that I might turn nasty..

I feel that poly and secondary school are quite different. The friends you mixed around with.. In secondary school you can just stick with your best pal the whole day feeling happy and not worrying about anything. In secondary school you have CCA and im in the same CCA with my closer friends Himlim and yiling.. Went through ups and downs, tiffs or upset with each other, but still able to gather down together at playground playing catching and playing candles during mooncake festival. It seems childish but I was really happy with them.

Hanging out with valerie last time in secondary school was really very fun too. Broke out in front of her so many times but she's always there. :) Now she is having her A levels so all the best to her! =) I think JC life is quite similar to secondary school. ( but we are drifting apart.. I believe if we went to the same school after secondary we'll stick together.) Poly is more of leading private life.. Zane is my closest friend in poly. But we seems to have different views and character. She's mature and her thinking is very adult. She speaks her mind out which I believe most people don't really do that. She's a nice person and caring and think for other people, but she sometimes can be too straightfoward..

I keep more things to myself now. I tell my problems to jeremy or my mum now.

Jeremy understands me well , and thats one problem because he knows what i want but he purposely dont want to do what i want. That is unnecessary right? Why not just make me happy and we both feel happier?

My mum understands me very well and always listen to me and i always listen to her. Always talk to her for hours on the sofa these days. She's going for her last chemo session on monday and she'll be free of all these chemo!! My dad's birthday is after her last chemo session and my sister would finish her PSLE by that time! :) Must celebrate!

posted by lemonade boa.  # Friday, October 05, 2007